Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Krazy Bargains

We had to run some errands today. Just typical stuff people have to do. Had to pay some bills, get a blood test and copy of Police Records for our Residence Permit renewal. Pick up a Registration sticker for the Land Rover because the Department of Road Stuff had run out of them (again) back when it was actually inspected. The usual.

Had to run by the ABM at the bank. This is our preferred entrance:

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We think Land Rover was a good choice for these roads. Something with steel treads and armor plating would be even better. These roads can be tough on tires if you drive them every day:

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I had to go back to one of the local department stores to pick up some pieces missing from a bed frame we bought from them. Now, I gotta tell you about this store. It's about the closest thing to a complete Department Store we have here on Provo.The name of this establishment is "Krazy Bargains". It's truly the kind of store that has something for everyone.

When you first pass the gate in the chain link fence, you start to realize that this is a serious store. It's run by Pakistani's, and they truly do their best to offer some sampling of anything a person could want. Or a reasonable facsimile thereof.

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The sign under the ladders says "Tiles-Grocery, Paint-Furnitures, Varnish, Appliances, Doors". And for sure they have ALL of that, and more. I mean, when was the last time you could pick up tiles, Spam,cookies, flowers and varnish all in one place? Not recently, I bet. Well, we can do all that and more at "Krazy Bargains". Don't think for a moment that choices are limited to tiles, groceries, paint, varnish, furniture, appliances and doors. No way, man. Not at Krazy Bargains.

The external magnificence of this Tropical Taj Mahal is but a gilded wrapping for the limitless treasures inside. And even before you enter, you are presented with merchandise. There are septic tanks, and racks of PVC outside. ...but that's only the beginning... That architectural marvel of an exterior is just fancy trappings for an incredible shopping experience once you get inside. It is a veritable cornucopia of, well...stuff:

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Amazing stuff they've packed inside in all their nooks and crannies. Their inventory's deep and wide, these wily Pakistanis.
There are five or six aisles running the length of the store, all very similar to this one. Each of them stocked to the tin rafters with an assortment of merchandise that truly covers all the basics and then some. What a mixture. Perfume, cotton, household glues. Pup tents, cements, and running shoes. There's mixing bowls and drills for holes, and drawers just like your granny's. I tell you, son, it's lot of fun to deal with Pakistani's.

We can choose from exotic imported footwear from as far away as Miami and Taiwan in the cozy shoe department:

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We can add a shower stall or toilet to the top of our grocery cart in the plumbing fixtures corner:

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Rails for stairs, outdoor chairs, bathroom and kitchen sinks. Toys for boys and joys for goys and fans for stuff that stinks.

I know the sign mentioned appliances, but we ain't just talking coffeemakers and mixers here. Although there are literally stacks of those along with the usual toasters, blenders, tubing benders, popcorn poppers , bathtub stoppers... exotic names, way off brands, pressure cookers from foreign lands, these guys have gone all the way. There is a comprehensive selection of fridges, washers, electric dryers, coolers, compactors, needle nose pliers, anything you could want. And some things you probably don't.

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I did not see many brand names I recognized. Well, one, actually, and that was DaeWoo. But they make good stuff. The names of the others were in languages that bring to mind exotic places far from here. Written in Asian characters from a land beyond the reach of UL or OSHA regulations. Free-range appliances.

And Electronics? Man, they got cameras, boom boxes, flat screen tv's, amps, speakers, stacks of CD's cameras, televisions, DVD players, with insect foggers and shoes for joggers. From the far corners of the earth. You name it, and Krazy Bargains most likely has something that resembles it closely.

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Now, I DID recognize some names here. Panasonic and Toshiba for example. I confess I cannot give an opinion on JWIN, Coby, or Gamma.

Once you get to the end of the electronics and appliance aisle, you can choose something from the small but well-stocked boutique:

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I was not in a clothes-buying mode today, but if I were I know exactly what to expect here. And today there was a special price, 30% discounts on all clothing. I can only assume the fall and winter fashions are nearing the shore on their way from Paris and Milan, and the heavily stocked shelves must be thinned in preparation.

I know I mentioned groceries...so I won't dwell on all the combinations of beans, rice, curry, canned tuna and juice. And they stock Spam, you just can't beat it (The moslems stock it though they won't eat it)..but just let me assure you, a man's palate need never want for variety at Krazy Bargains.

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By this point my mind was reeling with all the possibilities. I wanted to see more, but they had located the parts to the bed-frame, and I had promises to keep. Otherwise I would have taken photos of all of the other treasures within these walls. Diesel generators, and gasoline motors, specialized tools for removing brake rotors. Power tools, toothpaste, drill bits and sockets. Blue hair ribbons and fake gold lockets. Cake pans, toilet scrubbers, brass door stops. School supplies, traps for flies, and pink flip-flops. Batteries, ladies foundation garments, cellular phones. Salve for hives, carving knives, and saws just made for bones. Drinking glasses, writing squibs, Fancy rugs, and baby cribs...

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Bedding, toys, games for boys,computer desks and cookies. Stuff for schools, mechanics tools, and card games made for rookies.
An entire section dedicated to the artist working in artificial floral arrangements:

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Ah, I thought, they advertise tiles, and I do not see any tiles...I thought I might have caught those scamps making false promises. Not so. I was directed outside to a colorful and complete selection of ceramics. A potter's mile of stylish tile, an outside aisle to spend a while:

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"Yeah," says I,"but what if I wanted, for example, 2,000 square feet of that squiggly looking thing there...?" No problem. The man was ready to drive me down to their BIG warehouse where he assured me they had stacks of pallets of the stuff. And I believed him.

Well, with my mind still reeling from the sensory overload of finding a treasure trove of this magnitude right here on the island, I took my bed frame parts and staggered away.
But I feel a lot better now, knowing that if I somehow suddenly need a bench vise, water pump, bug sprayer, or some stainless steel deck screws, I know exactly where to go. It may look rough, theres lots of stuff, in all their nooks and crannies. If you ask nice, about the price, they'll smile, these Pakistani's. They like to deal, and that's for real, their tongues were made to waggle. It's not the fight, they don't feel right, if you won't stop to haggle.

It's just.....Krazy.

11 comments:

Don said...

Looks like a Walmart-eBay store

Ben said...

No beer at Krazy Bagains?

Gringo said...

you know, I did not see any beer. But please realize, that does not mean they don't sell it. Their competitor, Music Man,runs a liquor store right down the road.

Whitecaps said...

Where do they keep the live Chickens?

Nice store..How long does it take you guys to drive there?

Gringo said...

We can get to this store driving on pavement the whole way, so it's about a ten minute drive. I noticed they have a better nuts and bolts selection than the Do-It center. Stainless, metric, galvanized. I also saw a couple of woodworkers style quick release bench vises. I am thinking I should grab them now, even though I won't be fitting out my little workshop for months yet.

Anonymous said...

i see you have revealed another of your talents. Poetry! Remember, Dr Suess had to start somewhere.

Great post and blog.

Bob's Cay

gwnorth said...

Gringo,

This reminds me of a place in Mass called Spag's, been shut down for a few years now but my folks would take me there as a kid. You were from Mass right?

Gringo said...

Oh man, Spag's!! I haven't thought of that place in many years. yeah, when I lived up in the Westford area, we would make a couple shopping trips a year down to Spag's. Fill up a van with stuff.

I am not from Massachusetts, I just lived there off and on for years at a time during the past 30 years.

gwnorth said...

I googled it and actually read up on some interesting history on the place. Krazy Bargains also reminds me of a chain we have here in ME called Marden's, everything under the sum and then some. Thanks again for the Blog and hope the weather improves for you...Mark

Gringo said...

I remember the old Spag's. Used to hit it before fishing season started, when I needed tools, and early Christmas shopping. I was last there most likely in the early 90's.

By the way, La Gringa just changed this blog so if anyone is so inclined, you can now suscribe and get an automatic email when there's an update.

Johnny said...

Fre range appliances, yes my freind you have a way with words!